“There is mouse in us, and there is bird. The bird carries the cage upwards, while the mouse drags it down. A hundred thousand different wild beasts are together within us, but they are all converging on that moment when the mouse will renounce its mousehood and the bird its birdhood, and all become one.” ~Rumi [4]
At the core of my work with clients is to help them transform their attitude towards life and to reorient their identity. This new attitude and reorientation work is referred to as self knowing (Know thyself) which is the cornerstone of Universal Timeless Wisdom. Universal because it is not local or cultural, and timeless because there will never be a time that this truth goes out of fashion and won’t be applicable. Such work, if done in an open and open-ended manner leads to uncovering and living one’s unique life purpose; which means actualising one’s potentials in a meaningful and fulfilling way. But what is this self that one must know?
Each person has only one sense of self, but there are two aspects to our nature and therefore two orientations to knowing ourselves which can be named: the ego-self and the essential-self. It is a matter of who we take ourselves to be, which aspect of our nature we identify with more; our ego-self or our essential-self. In this context, “Know Yourself” means to recognise how our life is driven by our ego-self and to reorient ourselves to be gradually guided by our essential-self. We will then operate in the world with our physical capacities and personal characteristics, but guided by our essential-self.
In Rumi‘s words, this means recognising yourself as the jewel mine that you are:
Even though spellbound by this world,
in your inner sense you are a jewel mine.Open your inner eye;
return to your origin, to your essential self. ~Rumi [1]
In various teachings, the ego-self is also known as the familiar self, character or personality, relational self, the mouse by Rumi[4], Adam-1 by Rabbi Joseph B. Soloveitchik [2] and Self-1 by Timothy Gallwey [3].
The essential-self is also known as the authentic self, higher self, true self, the bird (by Rumi), Adam-2 and Self-2.
So, we have two aspects to our nature which are sometimes at odds with each other. We live in a society that is predominantly focused on the ego-self or Adam-1, while stifling the quiet voice of essential-self or Adam-2. David Brooks paraphrasing from Rabbi Soloveitchik describes them in the following manner:
| Adam-1 (Ego-self) | Adam-2 (Essential-self) |
|---|---|
| Career oriented, ambitious, wants to build, create, produce and discover things. | The internal or “the humble Adam” who not only wants to do good, but also to be good. |
| Wants to conquer the world. | Wants to obey a calling to serve the world. |
| Asks how things work. | Asks why things exist and ultimately why are we here. |
| Wants to venture forth. | Wants to be anchored in home. |
| Economic logic: | Moral logic (inverse): |
| Input leads to output. | You have to give to receive. |
| Effort leads to reward. | You have to surrender to something transcending yourself to gain strength within yourself. |
| Practice makes perfect. | You have to conquer your desires to get what you crave. |
| Greatest success leads to greatest failure which is pride. | |
| Failure can lead to the greatest success which is humility and learning. | |
| In order to fulfil yourself, you have to forget yourself. | |
| In order to find yourself, you have to lose yourself. |
The goal is not to be one or the other; it is rather to strike a balance between the two aspects of our nature. It is about integration and becoming whole. But unfortunately the society and culture are increasingly oriented towards the ego-self (Adam-1) to the extent that most of us are conditioned to take ourselves only as that. We mostly identify with our ego-self with little or no experience of our essential-self. This is the disintegration of the self which leads to much malaise.
The good news is that we can live a worldly life inspired and guided by our essential-self, and function in the world through our ego-self which is at our service, not our master. This is being a whole person.
Rumi puts it beautifully as follows:
Within us are many things. There is mouse in us, and there is bird. The bird carries the cage upwards, while the mouse drags it down. A hundred thousand different wild beasts are together within us, but they are all converging on that moment when the mouse will renounce its mousehood and the bird its birdhood, and all become one. For the goal is neither going up or down. When the goal shows itself clearly, it will be neither above nor below. ~Rumi [4]
Another helpful metaphor might be to imagine yourself driving through the terrain of life in a car which is both navigated and driven by your ego-self and you are not even aware of your essential-self who might be locked up in the boot, or at best sitting in the backseat, and repeatedly put down or shut down in any true heart-inspired moments of your life. The process of self-knowing gradually leads to flourishing of the essential-self and cooperation between the two. The ego-self keeps driving the car of life but now the navigator is the essential-self who does not know how to drive but feels and senses the way. This is the beautiful inner teamwork of a whole or integrated person who is now much better equipped to deal with the ups and downs of life. There will be hiccups, hardships and getting lost here and there, but the map (or the GPS) of the essential-self keeps improving and gets finetuned through such life experiences. Eventually we will have a significantly much better chance of ensuring we do not waste our precious life wandering around in the maze of life going nowhere meaningful.
Crossroads of life
Who is the navigator of your life?
Again, the good news is that we can live a worldly life inspired and guided by our essential-self, while operated and functioning in the world through our ego-self.
I invite you to reflect on this and feel free to share your thoughts, feelings and comments.
Notes:
[1] See Dear Rumi, tell me about money.
[2] In “The Lonely Man of Faith” by Rabbi Joseph B. Soloveitchik. Adam 1 and Adam 2 are also briefly described by David Brooks in his book “Road to Character”. You can watch his speech with the same title here (~9:45 minutes mark, Resume virtues vs. Eulogy virtues.)
[3] Timothy Gallwey is the author of the popular “Inner Game” series, beginning with “The Inner Game of Tennis”, see his website.
[4] Rumi, Fihi Ma Fihi (Discourses of Rumi), Discourse 7, p 50. OMPHALOSKEPSIS Publications, Ames, IOWA. Based on A. J. Arberry’s translation). It used to be available for free download here http://www.omphaloskepsis.com/Library/TDOR.pdf .
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(Last updated July 2022)
